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You Vill Train for Nothing und you Vill be Happy

 

Tis supposed to be the season to be jolly

But I find it ruined by corporate folly

By this mean, I groan and sneer

Meanwhile, all the normal people smile and cheer

For what comes soon is entertaining

But for me, I’m stuck with corporate trainings

They search for gifts or something new, maybe crafts and trinkets too

But for me, I have certificates to renew

Many others get fuller shelves

But for me they added something else?

They say it’s for our good and safety

but they’ve been taking so much more time lately

“Did you submit this completement slip?”

My father’s Christmas gift just shipped!

Letters and packages loom

While I’m watching this lecture on Zoom

They stop on purpose to ask us questions

I give them all the wrong answers did I mention?

I get a chuckle or a laugh

But unfortunately, it didn’t pass

They ask someone else the exact same question

Hoping to get the correct expression

I see someone else did comply

And gave the host the expected reply

They all nod their head in agreement

Is this a form of twisted appeasement?

Maybe next year it’ll be online text

So I click and click next and next

Never reading a single word

And still passing the quiz, absurd.

The season comes to the bitter end

But next year the trainings come again

I ask myself what did I learn?

Nothing and got useless PDFs I earned

Every year these records get burned

Every year, less I endured

I overhear supervisors talk and talk

I listen in and it makes me gawk

“We have new problem with the staff”

“Do they need class? Better! Online training?!”

“It’s better than a class, that’ll make them happy!”

“it’ll be just an hour long, that’s pretty snappy!”

Overcome with doom and gloom

I need to get out of here pretty soon…

 

Merry Christmas Everyone!

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